Just a Friendly reminder

In the grand scheme of things 9 times out of 10 when you think you're struggling with life there's someone out there who's struggling just as much or maybe even more than you.

I used to use this idea as a way to keep myself grounded and grateful for all that I had in life. It was my motive to not get struck in the what if or the why me moments of life. My way to keep myself motivated and going forward rather than drowning in my sorrow, sadness and depression. 

Well it worked for a while but what I quickly realized once I started therapy and started digging up old wounds in an attempt to deal with them was that I hadn't been coping with my stress well at all. Before therapy I had just been sweeping it all under the rug and that was why it all came tumbling down once it started to get too much and I made the decision to deal with it. 

Well have I dealt with it? Nope, will I get back to trying to deal with it? I don't know. It's more a question of do I want to than anything else honestly. It's a valid point that we need to count our blessings and be grateful for whatever we have in life especially if we're better off than a lot of people; roof over our heads, family that cares that we're alive, clothes on our back, food in bellies etc but it doesn't mean that we should ignore our feelings or our mental health under the guise of "it could be worse" because that in turn is a part of the problem. 

What we do need to do is recognize when our problems start affecting our day to day life and seek methods to cope that are healthy and not harmful inclusive of ignoring said problems in place of "well it could be worse", "you're luckier than most" and other equally harmful ideologies. Validate your feelings, accept them and look for ways to deal with them. Understand that yes someone has it worse out there but that doesn't make your issues any less valid or important. You have to find the balance. 

I want to find that balance, because I do not want to be that "always depressed, reclusive, emotionally unavailable girl" anymore. I also don't want to be in therapy all my life or to go back to sweeping everything under the rug because that would be me undoing all the things I've learned while studying to be a social worker and during my time in therapy, which would suck honestly. I'm trying to find the balance between putting in the work to get better mentally and not ignoring the fact that I yes it could be worse but my thoughts, feelings and emotions are important and that it is okay to take the steps necessary to deal with them. Doing so does not make me weak or ungrateful.

If anyone can relate, sound off in the comments

Happy New Year y'all.

Trial & Error